So you want to know why I am helping you. You want to find a way to ask me what my agenda is? What if I said that I do not have one? Is that inconceivable?
Well let me help you conceive of the notion that some of us GIVE without expecting anything in return – because we are “wired” that way.
I help people because I LIKE to help people. Pure and simple. It amazes me how many times I have been asked WHY! It seems that in today’s society it is difficult for many to believe that there are some of us that do not have a “hidden agenda” behind our smile. It is especially difficult for those whose lives are steered by their own hidden agendas.
Because I am NOT naturally materialistically-driven, I have others manage the financial aspects of my businesses. This is the sensible thing to do. Because I believe in the values of making things clear and legitimate, I have others manage the legal aspects of my businesses. Basic common sense. But regarding how to HELP others achieve their success through coaching, training and facilitating connections, I do so because it bring me JOY to do so. I don’t have to have any other reason. Really.
I have found that increasingly, this blatant love of helping others “just because” has left many baffled. The response is “why would someone want to do something without expecting anything in return?”
Others express discomfort because they don’t want to feel like they “owe something in return”. Codswallop to that! To someone who is a natural GIVER these notions can become exasperating.
When I can give freely, I give. It’s that simple. The only time I expect something in return is when my time is utilized on a project for a client. That is business and though I love my pro bono work, I would not be able to be as accommodating without my fee-paying contracts.
Of course, I have been in situations where my help has been abused. I have made some blind decisions to help people who had their own hidden agenda. These things happen and thankfully, once they become evident, I am very comfortable disengaging from such relationships. I have no problem burning a bridge that is constructed with barbed wire and poison ivy because there are ALWAYS other bridges. Seriously!
Help others because you LIKE HELPING not because of what you can get from it. The reward is is being able to make a difference in another person’s life. For the true encourager/motivator/coach, this should be enough satisfaction. Don’t get me wrong, I am not saying that one should work for free – but the decision to take on the role of helping another person or business succeed should be based on the satisfaction you will get from achieving this goal. If your decision is predominantly for the monetary results, you will remain unfulfilled and may need to consider spending your time in another field.
keep in mind that in business, especially in this time of social media, your reputation is tied instantly with those you associate with so you want to ensure those relationships are a good representation of who you are and how you want to represent your business.
So, what is my hidden agenda? it is this and this alone – I get JOY from knowing that I have made someone else feel better about themselves and their lives. I get JOY in knowing that I am made for this purpose and I get JOY from the revelation that I am being used for the purpose of my existence.
it’s not complicated. Not to me. So next time you need my help and I help you out “just because I can” – please accept it. Don’t analyze it.
Originally written: 2010 | All Rights Reserved © A.V.Powers
Follow me on twitter: @StrategicPowers